Real Manliness

**Brig the Manly** · 08-03-2008, 12:06 PM

IF MANLY RULED THE WORLD

Any fake phone number a girl gave you would automatically forward your call to her real number.
Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable response to "I love you."
Hallmark would make "Sorry, what was your name again?" cards.
When your girlfriend really needed to talk to you during the game, she'd appear in a little box in the corner of the screen during a time-out.
Breaking up would be a lot easier. A smack to the ass and a "Nice hustle, you'll get 'em next time" would pretty much do it.
Birth control would come in ale or lager.
You'd be expected to fill your resume with gag names of people you'd worked for, like "Heywood J'Blowme."
Each year, your raise would be pegged to the fortunes of the NFL team of your choice.
The funniest guy in the office would get to be CEO.
"Sorry I'm late, but I got really wasted last night" would be an acceptable excuse for tardiness.
Tanks would be far easier to rent.
Garbage would take itself out.
Instead of beer belly, you'd get "beer biceps."
Instead of an expensive engagement ring, you could present your wife-to-be with a giant foam hand that said, "You're #1!"
Valentine's Day would be moved to February 29th so it would only occur in leap years.
"Cops" would be broadcast live, and you could phone in advice to the pursuing cops.(Or to the crooks.)
The only show opposite "Monday Night Football" would be "Monday Night Football From A Different Camera Angle."
Telephones would automatically cut off after 30 seconds of conversation.

Sanger Zonbolt · 08-03-2008, 12:36 PM

STICKY NOW

**Brig the Manly** · 08-03-2008, 12:39 PM

STICKIED FOR TEH MANLINESS

Emo Kid · 08-03-2008, 12:42 PM

for President, 2008!!

*Kira* · 08-03-2008, 12:45 PM

*Kaze* · 08-03-2008, 01:30 PM

hells yes

*Kira* · 08-03-2008, 02:45 PM

Cool list but Rugby is more manly than American football

Dani · 08-03-2008, 02:48 PM

I approve.

Zabuza Momochi · 08-04-2008, 07:38 PM

This is the bomb.

**Brig the Manly** · 08-05-2008, 07:28 PM

Emo Kid · 08-05-2008, 09:18 PM

*first to rate thread 5

stars*

.:Bunny:. · 08-05-2008, 09:25 PM

...

I won't be manly.

...

Emo Kid · 08-05-2008, 09:30 PM

Gasp.
Bunny R a girl? :O

...

Zabuza Momochi · 08-05-2008, 10:38 PM

Sheesh that picture just killed my brain.

Emo Kid · 08-05-2008, 10:43 PM

Too much manliness for you.

08-03-2008, 12:06 PM	#1 (permalink)
Brig the Manly MANLY HERO Administrator Join Date: May 2008 Location: Horobi Age: 100 Posts: 1,333	Real Manliness IF MANLY RULED THE WORLD Any fake phone number a girl gave you would automatically forward your call to her real number. Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable response to "I love you." Hallmark would make "Sorry, what was your name again?" cards. When your girlfriend really needed to talk to you during the game, she'd appear in a little box in the corner of the screen during a time-out. Breaking up would be a lot easier. A smack to the ass and a "Nice hustle, you'll get 'em next time" would pretty much do it. Birth control would come in ale or lager. You'd be expected to fill your resume with gag names of people you'd worked for, like "Heywood J'Blowme." Each year, your raise would be pegged to the fortunes of the NFL team of your choice. The funniest guy in the office would get to be CEO. "Sorry I'm late, but I got really wasted last night" would be an acceptable excuse for tardiness. Tanks would be far easier to rent. Garbage would take itself out. Instead of beer belly, you'd get "beer biceps." Instead of an expensive engagement ring, you could present your wife-to-be with a giant foam hand that said, "You're #1!" Valentine's Day would be moved to February 29th so it would only occur in leap years. "Cops" would be broadcast live, and you could phone in advice to the pursuing cops.(Or to the crooks.) The only show opposite "Monday Night Football" would be "Monday Night Football From A Different Camera Angle." Telephones would automatically cut off after 30 seconds of conversation. __________________ Spoiler

08-03-2008, 12:39 PM	#3 (permalink)
Brig the Manly MANLY HERO Administrator Join Date: May 2008 Location: Horobi Age: 100 Posts: 1,333	STICKIED FOR TEH MANLINESS __________________ Spoiler

08-03-2008, 12:45 PM	#5 (permalink)
Kira SHIN SEKAI NO KAMI VIP Moderator Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 1,095	__________________

08-03-2008, 01:30 PM	#6 (permalink)
Kaze Thunder Emperor Super Moderator VIP Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Leeds Age: 19 Posts: 630	hells yes __________________

08-03-2008, 02:45 PM	#7 (permalink)
Kira SHIN SEKAI NO KAMI VIP Moderator Join Date: Jul 2008 Posts: 1,095	Cool list but Rugby is more manly than American football __________________

08-03-2008, 02:48 PM	#8 (permalink)
Dani Jotaro-tard MANLY Rival Appears! VIP Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Sanctuary of the Fallen MANLY Gods Posts: 1,332	I approve. __________________ Spoiler Card By Dio Brando

08-05-2008, 07:28 PM	#10 (permalink)
Brig the Manly MANLY HERO Administrator Join Date: May 2008 Location: Horobi Age: 100 Posts: 1,333	__________________ Spoiler

08-05-2008, 09:25 PM	#12 (permalink)
.:Bunny:. ♥ INSANE TOBI FANGIRL ♥ VIP Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: LOLWHUT ? LOLWHUT ? LOLWHUT ? Posts: 716 Blog Entries: 3	... I won't be manly. ...

08-05-2008, 10:43 PM	#15 (permalink)
Emo Kid I am really special 'cause there's only one of me. Look at my smile; I'm so damn happy other people are jealous of me! When I'm sad and lonely, I like to sing this song. It cheers me up and shows me that I won't be sad for long OH OH OH I'm so haaapp Special Jounin Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Look up. Look left. Look right. Look back. There's only one place left. Posts: 808	Too much manliness for you. __________________ *Fortune by Dio Brando* Spoiler